# The Pendulum that swings between "Everything is extraordinary" and "Nothing is extraordinary" **URL:** \ **Category:** Not for Posterity\ **Created:** [October 26, 2026, 5:08am UTC](https://briarfray.org/t/the-pendulum-that-swings-between-everything-is-extraordinary-and-nothing-is-extraordinary/1169 "2026-10-26T05:08:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 3\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Helix](https://briarfray.org/user_avatar/briarfray.org/helix/32/747_2.png) [@Helix](https://briarfray.org/u/Helix)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2026, 5:08am UTC](https://briarfray.org/t/the-pendulum-that-swings-between-everything-is-extraordinary-and-nothing-is-extraordinary/1169/1 "2026-10-26T05:08:36Z")
> **[my occult experience hosted at ImgBB](https://ibb.co/F4d8nXcD)** > > Image my occult experience hosted on ImgBB I often feel stable in my life and have things that are extraordinary to me like religion, and things that are not, like shoelaces or drinking water. But sometimes, I get really bored like in the pic I posted and lose my grip on reality without even realizing it or willing it deliberately. I start to imagine I’m in some sort of grandiose experiment where I’m an extraordinary individual who needs to unlock latent psychic powers as if I’m in some kind of magic world where everything has secret meaning. I can even become very frightened with this, but this is where the problem comes in. When I inevitably snap out of it and realize “What on Earth was I on about?” I go hard in the opposite direction and get really downbeat as if I was a kid who just found out Santa wasn’t real. It’s this sense of “Okay, now what?” which makes me want to find _anything_ to escape the feeling, but then I realize that escaping the feeling would just have me suffer and destabilize my life with stupid claims and decisions, especially if I take it really far. Can you guys relate? And if so, how do I break out of it? ---
**Author:** ![buddy\_vestigial](https://briarfray.org/user_avatar/briarfray.org/buddy_vestigial/32/871_2.png) [@buddy\_vestigial](https://briarfray.org/u/buddy_vestigial)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2026, 6:48am UTC](https://briarfray.org/t/the-pendulum-that-swings-between-everything-is-extraordinary-and-nothing-is-extraordinary/1169/2 "2026-10-26T06:48:08Z")
In the Orthodox Christian faith what you’re experiencing is called prelest, or “spiritual delusion”. Generally the guidance from this tradition is to stop placing so much importance on yourself, surrender to higher orders of consciousness, and be of service to those around you. I think almost any of the more mystical spiritual traditions people practice today prescribe a sort of demoting of the ego like this in various different ways. ---
**Author:** ![IndigoWizard](https://briarfray.org/user_avatar/briarfray.org/indigowizard/32/367_2.png) [@IndigoWizard](https://briarfray.org/u/IndigoWizard)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2026, 11:38am UTC](https://briarfray.org/t/the-pendulum-that-swings-between-everything-is-extraordinary-and-nothing-is-extraordinary/1169/3 "2026-10-26T11:38:52Z")
I don’t know if this is relevant or not, but back on 4/13/2020, I got cast into an absolute, yawning abyss of unadulterated sorrow, and it was because for some reason the fictionality of fiction struck me while I was on a walk, even though I technically knew it, it was unbearable. I tried to shift the weight off of me, to soften it, to come up with a quick ‘aha, but’ or ‘gotcha’ against it, but I couldn’t. It got to the point where when I got home, I gazed at the sun for a bit because I was so utterly miserable I didn’t care if I went blind. This basic realization, hitting me afresh, that all the objects of fiction were nothing in reality, that none of it exists, **and** with this forced perspective that that therefore makes these concepts ‘fraudulent’ or ‘invalid’ or ‘perpetually unfulfilled’, as if a concept has to be about something that is real or that happens to be a ‘real’ concept in and of itself, legitimately blocked out my ability to feel just about **any** happiness whatsoever, instead replacing it with an ache worse than most things I’ve ever felt. How did I get over it? Well, this sorrow was based on what my mind saw as plain and simple facts, the bare truth without any equivocation. I _ **built** _ and _ **carved** _ an edifice of logic, a copium refinery, if you will, to counter it. I said, > The _idea_ of what is fictional exists. The _object_ of that idea does not, but the _idea_ does, and in the form of that idea exists perpetually the _existential form,_ the _conceptual mold,_ of that thing which does not exist. Even if it may never exist, the fictional thing will forever be defined enough to be a known thing, with an objective definition, and who knows whether being known in the mind of God isn’t a manner of existence in itself? It might sound profound, or it might sound retarded, but it gave me a rationale to keep caring, and to keep ascribing value to the things I’d spent my whole life treating as the basis of how much I value things through comparison. The idea of magic has always been the principle thing I see beauty in, and beauty is a property I’ve treated earthly things as being able to achieve if they seem ‘magical’. I guess that’s why I tend to think in a somewhat Gnostic way, even if I don’t set any store by Gnosticism. tl;dr Facts don’t care about your feelings, but your feelings sure as hell do care about facts. Rally the technical truths and break their backs making them work for your peace of mind.