Briar Fray is open to all kinds of thinkers, and welcomes a very wide range of debate. However, when I created this website I didn’t want it to have a smothering, narcissistic atmosphere like in many communities I had visited. This is essentially where users who don’t really fit the mold of the community are treated narcissistically until they leave.
If you have a “welcome to the internet” mentality (best encapsulated by someone like Mister Metokur), you may find “anti-bully” policies to be really cringe. And, yeah, they are pretty cringe.
But look, if you’ve been around on the internet long enough to even KNOW about a site like this, you are no doubt already used to being bullied. I know that you can handle it, especially given that you probably found it through 4chan or some dark corner of X.
However, I don’t really care for it. Like, when you’re trying to make some point and the other guy mentally cannot handle it or steers the conversation in an emotional direction. That’s annoying, and we can do better than that. If you really think of yourself as an “intellectual,” then you should at least be able to control your emotions.
So, on this site we have a harder challenge for our users: be nice, or at least don’t be a bitch, specifically to other users of the site. If you want to attack individuals who are not on the site, go ahead. If you want to attack groups collectively (“white people are evil,” “Jews are bad”), go ahead. I know that users may fall under those categories and be offended, but this just something that we have to allow. You can even morally criticize other users of the site – just don’t be nasty. (Unless, I don’t know, the guy was caught grooming a minor or something reaaaally bad. I think you know what’s acceptable and what’s not, it’s just whatever is common sense).
SO BE HUMBLE! Humility is more important than being right. The purpose of this site is to open your minds to a range of ideas. Not necessarily every idea (pedophilia and terrorism are banned), but you will learn a lot, especially if you aren’t malding all the time.
Notes:
1
Anger is narcissistic. Vice versa, Narcissistic Personality Disorder is an angry condition. An angry person will become abusive, they will lie, defame or gaslight the recipient, distort reality.
2
A person will get involuntarily angry after multiple failed attempts at a task. This is just how our brain works. If you try to thread a needle and you keep missing, and you keep missing, and you keep missing, it doesn’t matter how stoic you think you really are: you will get angry. So if the conversation really isn’t going anywhere, it might be better to quietly exit before you start malding.
3
Being polite to your enemies doesn’t necessarily mean that you are now intellectual comrades. Personally, I find the whole “We are on opposite sides but we’re still friends!” thing to be really forced and uncomfortable. But you can at least engage your enemies stoically.
4
Users are not typically banned for offenses, they are typically muted for about a day. In fact, I try not to intervene over every little comment, and I usually try to leave a comment first. It’s just when I see that a conversation is becoming unproductive, or the user isn’t obeying me.
5
If you guys really don’t like the policy, I will change it.
6
I am not a legalist who strictly enforces every rule. I think of this site like a garden: whatever isn’t to my liking gets snipped.
John Zobele